20 Unimportant Things I’ve Learned Whilst Living in France.


I’ve been living in France for nearly 6 months and I love it and hate it simultaneously. If I could pick up every inch of my life and plunk it down in France, I would. I miss my family, my friends, my dog, my boyfriend and most importantly Heinz tomato soup. If all that existed here, in amongst the glorious weather and even better food, I couldn’t imagine a more perfect existence. However, that’s an impossible dream and one I won’t waste time on. 

The great news is, for the most part, I’m having a wonderful time and can actually speak French which was kind of the main goal. Whilst living here I have also learned several relatively unimportant things:

  1. I’d look ridiculous riding a bike, carrying my baguette in the front basket.
  2. French people outside of Paris are actually nice. 
  3. A lot of people outside France, struggle to digest that Paris is not the only place in France.
  4. The French find it perfectly acceptable to leave their dog shit lying everywhere-returning home without dog poo smothered shoes is unheard of.
  5. Marseille is one of the filthiest places I’ve ever been but I like it. It’s got a certain scummy, soiled something. 
  6. If I didn’t think it was completely unacceptable, I’d eat 3 tarte au citrons a day. 
  7. I’m a ‘bombe’, according to the 10 year old children at my school. This is apparently a very sexual term in French, not sure how I feel about this. 
  8. My landlord’s cat would like to move in with me despite my roommate throwing water on her. She eats mice on my doorstep. The cat, not my roommate.
  9. Hating the same person is the foundation of a beautiful friendship.
  10. Italians are kind but also fabulously fiery.
  11. Never trust a French train, you will only end up disappointed. 
  12. I hate teaching.
  13. Children are horrible and I am glad I will never be one again.  
  14. There’s no bread, like French bread.
  15. Last year I was on 13 flights, how unlucky. 
  16. I like Camembert cheese, heated in the oven so it’s all gooey and you can dip baguette in.
  17. It’s not ok to eat an entire baguette with Camembert alone. Vomitting will follow.
  18. I thought Frankfurt airport was called Frankfurter, like the sausage.
  19. Mosquitos are the devil.
  20. Finally, although not so unimportant, I am the happiest I’ve ever been in my life.

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